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If you are under the impression the story of Lot’s wife being turned into a pillar of salt because she wanted to see her home one last time shows how petty God is, you haven’t heard the story of Gehazi yet. But let’s start at the beginning.
Naaman is a mighty commander fighting for the king of Aram. Unfortunately he’s also leprous, which sucks.
So when Naaman hears of the prophet Elisha who is famous for healing people and even raising the dead, he sniffs a chance to be ridden of his illness.
So Naaman puts together a huge delegation and visits the famous faith healer, bringing presents and whatnot. But Elisha, ever the artist, doesn’t give a rat’s arse and stays indoors, telling Naaman via messenger to bathe in the river Jordan seven times.
Naaman is mad. Aint nobody got time for this. He tells Elisha he wants him to do his voodoo and wave his hands over the leprosy or whatever magicians do when they do their tricks.
Naaman’s servants beg him to at least give the bathing thing a try. At long last, Naaman agrees and and jumps into the river Jordan.
When he pops his head out of the water for the seventh time he’s pleased to see the leprosy has vanished. Hooray!
Naaman is relieved and he wants to show his appreciation by showering Elisha with presents. But Elisha declines, as he was only doing his job and whatnot.
Enter Gehazi, the prophet’s assistant, who thinks to himself: What the fuck? Here I am, serving my arse off every day, and my boss doesn’t even consider a little bonus?
So Gehazi makes out to follow Naaman’s delegation. Catching up with him, Gehazi lies to Naaman, claiming the prophet is receiving guests and would like to bestow a talent of silver and whatever else Naaman can spare.
Naaman, eternally grateful, doubles the amount and sends Gehazi home with his blessing.
But then everyone finds out and since God is really mad about Gehazi’s little ruse, he has the prophet punish Gehazi:
Gehazi is stricken with an incurable leprosy, which he will forever pass on to all of his descendants.
Yes, I shit you not: Because Gehazi in a moment of weakness gifted himself a little bonus, Gehazi and all of his children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and their children were to have leprosy and never be healed. Talk about guilt by association, eh?
And here’s us thinking the pillar of salt story was God being petty.
Source: 2. Kings 5
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